English Commentary
THE STRAITS TIMES
Home > Breaking News > Singapore > Story
Aug 20, 2009
Couple chased out by son
AN ELDERLY couple in Singapore who gave up their duplex to their son ended up homeless after he chased them out of the house, Sin Chew Daily reported on Thursday.
The couple now call the staircase of a school their home.
The man, who gave his surname as Lim, was a manager before he retired. He has a son and a daughter who live in Jurong.
Relating his ordeal to a secretary of the school, Mr Lim said he and his wife decided to give their duplex home to their son as a wedding gift about two years ago.
The couple thought that they could live in the house with their son. He, however, decided to sell the property for RM960,000 to buy another condominium. Mr Lim and his wife were then sent off to live with their daughter.
After a year, the daughter decided that they were no longer welcome and banned them from touching her children.
The couple could not enter the house after their daughter changed the locks to the house. -- THE STAR/ANN
---------------------------------------------
If you look up the term ‘filial piety’ on Wikipedia, you will realise that entire article heavily links filial piety to Chinese culture. Without a doubt, filial piety is given high priority by the Chinese. However, filial piety should not just be a virtue for the Chinese to uphold, but rather it should be universally practiced.
The great Chinese philosopher, Confucious, believed that filial piety was a virtue which was to be respected above all else. Despite the rootedness of filial piety in Chinese blood, I still see various cases of rebelliousness, rudeness and disrespect by children to their parents. The incident mentioned in the article might seem extreme, but I believe that it accurately reflects the worsening situation in Singapore.
Many believe that it is solely the child’s responsibility to exhibit filial piety. However, I believe that filial piety can only be cultivated in the child with the cooperation of two parties: the child himself, and his parents. The parents first have the responsibility to educate the child about filial piety. Failure to do this might cause defects in the child’s moral values in the future. Likewise, the child has a responsibility to respect his parents. Of course, there are some cases where parents dutifully teach children the right values but the children stay rebellious far into their adulthood. However, this is not an excuse for the parents to shirk their responsibility to teach their children.
The Bible states that parents are to ‘Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he shall not depart from it’ (Pro 22:6). It is, first and foremost, the responsibility of parents to train up their child. What does training up a child involve? The phrase ‘train up’ was originally used to describe the shaping of trees through the use of bending, lopping or pruning. This was done to achieve a desired shape. Likewise, parents should ‘bend’, ‘lop’ and ‘prune’ their child to eventually grow up to be in good moral shape. Training up naturally involves instruction and punishment, and parents should not be overly cautious in meting out either. In modern society, many parents do not believe in beating children or scolding them. However, especially for younger children, such forms of instruction and punishment are needed. As the saying goes, “spoil the rod and spare the child”. Indeed, if parents are too relaxed on their children, they will go wayward and the consequences might be dire for both parties.
On the other hand, the child has the responsibility to obey and respect their parents. Parents play the biggest role not just in providing for their child, but in shaping the character of the child. Their many sacrifices are testaments to this. Respecting their parents is the best way to show gratitude for their parents. Furthermore, if children respect their parents, this will show that they are able to respect authority. This has a large impact on society. If children are not even able to obey the most natural of authorities, how will they be able to obey authority on a societal level? This leaves them open to defy authority in school, at work, and even the government. Society is suffering from a bad case of moral decay, and if children are not well trained, I scarcely dare to think of what society will be like in the future.
We can see that both parents and their children have a part to play in the moral decay of society. To parents, I hope that you will train your children well. To children, I hope that you will give your parents the respect they deserve.
